Tuesday, December 31, 2013

A New Year!

     It was December 14, 2012 that I took my first step on this unexpected cancer journey.  Sheesh...what a year it's been.  As I look back over the past 12 months, I'm surprised how I feel about them.  It's not all doom and gloom.

     Although the peaks and valleys of this year's highs and lows have been extreme, the net amplitude has been much like other years.  No doubt this has been a very challenging year for my family and me, but in looking back, I don't think it's been more difficult than other difficult years I've weathered before.  The years that Wynn's grandmother, my father, and Wynn's mother died were very traumatic times for us.  The grief of those losses lasted for many months and rather than just disappearing, that grief seemed to only be able to slowly fade away as time passed. 

     When I first learned of the advanced stage of my cancer, I grieved.  I initially gathered information from the internet and expected to live no more than a year.  Soon after getting diagnosed, I was on the medical Autoban getting blood drawn, biopsies, CT scans, and MRIs.  In the mean time, I was on a traditional IV chemotherapy that was draining me of both energy and hope. 
     But, by the beginning of March, I was on an oral chemotherapy that has given me the opportunity to feel like I am truly in this game...if not to win...I have the confidence to be able to bob and weave my way as close to the end-zone as possible, for as long as possible. Unlike other times of grief, this time my grief seemed to be lifted away with every day that I gained normalcy on Xalkori.

     So, the really awful part of my 2013 lasted about two-and-a-half months.  Since then, my overall feeling of well-being has only gone up.  The last nine-and-a-half months have been pretty good.  Not great, but pretty darn good.  Good enough to look forward to 2014!

     From the bottom of my heart, I wish you all a Happy and Healthy New Year!! 

1 comment:

Wanwan said...

We all deserve a new year full of health, joy, love and peace!

Happy New Year, Luna!!

Jeri & Tsutomu, plus Chibi, Sammy and QP
(Yes, we've become the unofficial owners of Justin's and Sachiko's dogs!)